Archive for the 'LOL' category
Why I hate fat cocky women
Tuesday, January 2, 2007 12:15 am
I have nothing against fat people. You’re fat, fine, deal with it. I’m not going to discriminate against you because you’re fat. Fat people have every right to do what any other person has the right to do. Fat people are people too.
The type of fat people that I have a problem with are the one’s I like to call FCB’s, or fat cocky bitches. These are the girls who will wear the tightest, most revealing clothing, totally unaware of their fat ass nature, and walk around like they are god’s gift to men. These are the girls I hate with a passion.
Now, I’m all for self-confidence. If you have assets, by all means show them off. But at least show some fucking modesty and humility if your fat ass rolls are hanging out the bottom of your shirt and your skirt is doing the best it can to contain the abomination that is your ass. It’s disgusting and it’s a travesty. Its public indecency is what it is.
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Prank Calling Technology
Monday, January 1, 2007 11:26 pm
Do you have King Albert in a can? Is your refrigerator running? Such phrases used to be the rage of the Mad Magazine reading youth of the 70’s. Today the standard for the prank or crank call has been raised with examples in pop culture television shows such as the Simpson’s. There are now even entire shows, such as Comedy Centrals “Crank Yankers”, devoted to the art of fooling an unsuspecting phone recipient.
So what might we expect in the future? Well technology is beginning open some intriguing possibilities. I remember as an 11 year old having a tough time convincing someone in my high pitched voice that I was working on the electric lines and wanted to see if their refrigerator was running. With some modern assistance, such as MorphVOX a voice changing program from Screaming Bee, a kids chance of pulling off such a prank are greatly increased.
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ASK THE READERS : Friend Drops Phone in Port O Potty
Sunday, December 31, 2006 6:27 pm
Ok, so my friend and I are at the Chiefs - Jagoffuars game today… Drinking Beers, Bar-B-Qin up some Brats… throwing a football around. Getting a nice pregame buzz on, before throwing down $8.50 a beer. So, about 5 beers in, each. Its about 11:45am, so we making it toward Arrowhead.
Ah, we see the port-o-potty… we gots ta piss, yo. So, I go in… and notice that someone had just barfed. Nasty. So, I take my piss, and get out. Well, my friend, The Doctah, goes into piss. He pulls his coat back, and knocks the cellphone off his belt loop into the Blue Goo of PortOPotty Hell.
Oh man, Here is the question… would you go after it? He just bought the phone end of November… so phone is a couple days past the 30 day warranty… He just paid $350 for the Smart phone. 2.1 MegaPixel camera, Mp3 player, with Video, etc… Top notch phone. In the Puke, piss and shit of the JOhnny on the Spot… Would you grab it?
Imagine putting that shit infested phone up to your ear to another year. Me, I would have counted it as a loss. I wouldnt have reached in after it. heh.
Would You??
Naked Breakfast
Friday, December 29, 2006 2:19 amEx-cop plans ‘Never Get Busted Again’ video
Friday, December 22, 2006 5:01 pm
Former Texas agent teaches how to hide, stash, and fool drug officers
TYLER, Texas - A one-time Texas drug agent described by his former boss as perhaps the best narcotics officer in the country plans to market a how-to video on concealing drugs and fooling police.
Barry Cooper, who has worked for small police departments in East Texas, plans to launch a Web site next week where he will sell his video, “Never Get Busted Again,” the Tyler Morning Telegraph reported in its online edition Thursday.
A promotional video says Cooper will show viewers how to “conceal their stash,” “avoid narcotics profiling” and “fool canines every time.”
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How to Be a Pimp
1:10 pm
- Take a good look at your wardrobe. This is what NOT to wear: Abercrombie and Fitch, Hollister, American Eagle, Banana Republic, J.Crew, etc. Hell, do you see any rappers wearing this? Go for Echo, Rocawear, Sean John, Baby Phat, etc
- Work on your grooming. Men should not have long or shaggy hair, you can’t be a pimp and look like one of the beatles. So a nice short haircut will do. Women, wear something nice that shows off your your beautiful earrings something basic and do not overdo the makeup. You do not want to look like a slut. Women should have a pretty and unique manicure whether it’s short or long or airbrushed. Men need to be cleanly shaven and for that matter so do women, just in other areas. Facials are a good way for both male and female to keep a clear complexion, cause we don’t want to look at any zits.
Worst YouTube Video, Ever.
Thursday, December 21, 2006 11:39 pm
